Today, i moved my tongue!!!

Today, i finally moved my tongue. In my dream, my tongue moved! My voice was not so audible, but i uttered something. "Burn, burn!!!" I kept repeating.
Not so strange you think?!  Well you do not know my frustrations!

For a very long time in my life...i have been having this dream where i can not speak. My tongue is usually so heavy i can not move it no matter how hard i try. My voice disappears and my mouth can not open. At the same time, usually there is something very bad happening around that i am supposed to speak to, but all the time, i always i end up not being able to speak! It is such a frustrating and scary experience i tell you. You have to live it to understand.

Now, i live in a community where we believe that dreams are a manifestation of everyday life. It is in dreams that we at times get to continue and create our waking realities. Thereby...what happens in our dreams is sealed in our realities and what happens in our realities can at times be undone in our dreams. And this is where my fears begun.

You can imagine the fear i had of dreaming then. Not only dreaming for that matter, but for a long time i dreaded the end of day. I dreaded night fall and darkness. I kept awake for as long as i could until i eventually had a sleeping problem. I just could not sleep and for a while i loved it. But then it became another problem! Heheh!

What could it mean that i can not speak in my dreams? That there is something horrible happening to me and i just can not speak, when somehow it feels like if i speak then it will be over. That i will be safe.

Now today, in my dream, i was out in the field doing my thing (my work with women), everything was going on well. And then my uncle appeared...heheheh! (Don't ask). I went to say hi...and he did not recognise me, so i reminded him.
"Its Kajuzi", i said.
He could not remember me. He then introduced me to a lady seated next to him, his aid or something. And out of nowhere, before i knew what was happening, this woman was killing me. Yes, her face changed, she became some kind of animal i have never seen before. And she was surely killing me!

As usual, i could not move my tongue, nor could my mouth open. My voice was stuck somewhere inside me and no matter how hard i tried, it did not come out. It was scary. I struggled and struggled, almost to the point of dying. It was exhausting. And then just as i was about to give up, something pushed me on and i opened my mouth and it came out, a whisper at first, but it did come out. I eventually was screaming
"Burn in Jesus name, Burn"

Believe it or not, the woman started bleeding, from everywhere and she dropped, before my feet and turned into a scary skeleton. And then i woke up!!!

Well, i am not sure what that meant really, but am surely glad that my voice came out. And i surely do pray that the next time there is a stone that keeps growing into this boulder that is about to crush me and the whole world, then i will find my voice!











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